Thoughts and Reflections DS9
Posted on Thursday, 23 July 2020 - 6:56pm by
Eyelaya slumped down into the sofa. She put her head in her hands feeling very much like a screw up. The speech could not have gone worse.
Sighing she leaned back and activated the portable log system. “Computer, personal log.”
There was a chirp and she began, “Today could not have gone any worse. I got up there and I just froze. I looked out at the crowd and I felt like the whole room was spinning. The only thing that kept me from running off stage was that my body would not listen to me. I was like an Aldebran deer in the spotlight.”
She sighed. “I…I have never had issues talking but giving a speech…it seemed easy yet when I got up there I couldn’t do it. Cassia was there. She tried to help but I was laughed off stage.”
She paused and wiped her eyes. “In the end my work did get read, by someone else. I just stood back stage and listened to someone do, effortlessly, what I could not. At least my ideas were well received.”
She stood and walked over to the replicator ordering a cup of tea. “Cassia says it was okay and that I will get better but…I just don’t know. The ideas are sound but today made me question a lot in my life. I mean am I really ready? Should I even be out here?” She shook her head. “I just wish that I was braver and stronger. There are days that I feel that everyone is surpassing me.”
Eyelaya walked back to the sofa and placed the tea on the small coffee table. “The worst is still not over. I have to go to the gala tonight. If I couldn’t handle a speech how am I going to handle this? For that matter what will they all think? Everyone saw me flop.”
She paused for a long moment and then, “I am glad I met Cassia. So far she’s turned out to be an amazing person. I am a firm believer that a stranger is a friend you haven’t met and Cassia proves that to be true.”
Eyelaya rubbed her eyes again. “I have a few more days here and I think that once the gala is over I can figure out how to get myself to Bajor. I haven’t been there since I was a child. I always remember it as beautiful but I wonder if it will be that way when I return.” She smiled. “You know I can’t actually remember much about my childhood. I remember bits and pieces. Maybe being there on Bajor will jog some memory.”
She stood again but this time walked over to the bedroom close where her dress for the night hung. She brought it out into the living room and looked it over before she continued her log.
“I have a beautiful dress for the gala tonight. Cassia helped pick it out. I have to say I am excited about wearing it but there is an old Earth expression about displaying pearls before swine. I’m not high class, I’m not even…I don’t know pretty I guess. How will that dress look on me? Cassia tells me that it’s beautiful on me but I have never been one to see myself as beautiful.“ She licked her lips before continuing.
“I mean I’m not unfortunate looking but beautiful? Well we’ll see. To be honest I worry about how things will go tonight. If it goes as horribly as the speech then maybe I should just stay home.”
She paused the recording and took a good fifteen minutes to finish her tea and then she continued, “Well I should be getting ready. Cassia wants me to meet someone. Perhaps another friend? I guess I’ll see when I get there. Computer end log.”
She stood and hurried out. Cassia would be waiting for her on the promenade. She wondered who she would meet.