A lot on my mind
Posted on Thursday, 8 April 2021 - 8:04am by
Eyelaya finished drying her hair and headed to the living area. She still hadn’t gotten a roommate to replace Mac so she had the quarters to herself and was once again using the second bedroom as a shop/home office are. She was going to head there but decided for a cup of hot chocolate.
She was exhausted. She’d been working overtime on gadgets, keeping Engineering running and playing Chief Engineer. She actually loved it. To be able to be your own boss…sort of and not have to worry about the whims of others was great. She could work on what was necessary and she would rely on her own judgement of what was priority…well accept when the order came down from the Captain.
She got her cut of hot chocolate and settled in. She had the urge to journal but writing felt like too much of a chore. She would record a personal log instead. It was something she hadn’t done in quite a long time.
“Computer open personal log file and begin recording, add todays Star Date stamp and time.”
She waited until the computer went through its procedure. “Log ready.”
She sighed and began, ”Personal log, Eyelaya, well here I am, doing something I dislike the most, recording a personal log. I prefer to write everything out but tonight I’m just too tired. It’s been so stressful as of late and I have so much on my mind. There is even something that I want to talk to the captain about and have been putting off.
There are rumors swirling and I honestly don’t have the energy to investigate, unusual huh?
Personal wise I’ve been making friends or at least I think they’re friends. I’ve never been a good judge of that. I’ve always been socially awkward but I have found some people who accept that. I’ve also found Grol who seems to be more then just a friend but for some reason he doesn’t see it that way. We’ve been dating…at least I think it’s dating, for a while now and he just always says how happy he is to have found a good friend like me as if the intimate moments we’ve shared are nothing but a distraction from his everyday life. It’s been a bit confusing; I have to say.
Then there is Adrianna who has left wedding planning to me. I’m no good at that, I have been holding my own but to be honest I’m worried about taking a sort of lead on this. What if she hates it all and she no longer speaks to me?
Then the other problem is Haru, Mac’s partner. He’s so angry at me because he overheard me tell Mac to leave him for a while so that he could emotionally recover. Doesn’t he see how much Mac is hurting and how much he needs a break and an opportunity to take care of himself? I think this is another one of those areas where I have, what do humans say? Put my foot in my mouth.
Then there is Alexandra Kingsley. She and I have started a friendship and I am a little worried because before she and Soral were married, when I was just starting out on this ship, I had a bit of a crush on the commander. Granted I spilled coffee on him, knocked him down, caused him all sorts of trouble but that was all because I was nervous around him. I don’t have feelings for him anymore and it was just a small crush but I always feel guilty about it. I called my old EMH friend on the station and he said that perhaps telling her what I once felt for Soral will help. He even was able to give me some references on human psychology that support that line so I have to think about it.
Speaking of EMH’s I’ve been asked to overhaul the program a little and I am not looking forward to that. I am still deeply hurt by Emerick and I don’t want to talk to him. I explained all this to Grol and he offered to be there with me as I did the program calibrations. Emerick would need to be on for those and Grol offered to run interference. Now that I think about it I think that I will take him up on that offer.”
Eyelaya sighed and stretched. She looked at the time her eyes bugging out at how late it was. “Computer end log and file.”
She smiled; she had always loved the efficiency of the computer. “Well then. I think it’s time for bed,” she said to nobody in particular.
Slowly she got up, put her cup back in the replicator and hurried to her room. She turned down the warm covers and slipped into the bed pulling up her weighted and warm blanket. Even though she looked like a Bajoran the blood in her veins was Cardassian too so heat was something she liked much like the Vulcans. She kept her quarters at a higher temperature.
“Goodnight,” She said to the ship as she always did. She truly saw her ship as a living entity and she found that she talked to it often. She could swear that since she started doing that the ship was running better. Tomorrow was another day and he had many things she needed to do.