Confiding

Posted on Thursday, 13 August 2020 - 11:18am by Lieutenant Alex Kingsley & Lieutenant Ryan Rose MD

Mission: Operation: Jabberwocky
Location: Sickbay
Timeline: MD13, morning

“Doctor Rose?” Crossing the threshold between the corridor and Sickbay had seen all of Lieutenant Kingsley’s determination disappear out of the nearest airlock. She had vowed to do this alone, for Soral’s sake as much as her own. Pretending nothing was wrong would help no one and solve nothing. And as Chief Medical Officer, as well as a friend, Alex trusted that Ryan would maintain their privacy.

"Hello Alex." Ryan greeted warmly. Ryan was about to offer his congratulations on her recent marriage, but Alex did not look like a happily married newlywed. "Let's go to my office." He waved her in casually. Once inside he went straight to the replicator for two glasses of water, before meeting her at the couch. "What is it?" He finally asked.

“I don’t know how to even begin,” she admitted as she sank into the comfortable couch. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to burden you but as the doctor you have to know and ... it’s Soral. And I. Mostly him.”

Ryan nodded. "I received the medical reports from Dr Hades, but I've only just gotten back myself. I'm sorry Alex, I haven't had a chance to read it yet. Do you want to give me a short version? Or if you don't mind just waiting for a few minutes, I can go over it now."

"Short version," she decided, before smiling ruefully, "if there is such a thing. I know you wouldn't but some of this is probably more personal than absolutely medically necessary so it cannot leave this room...

She drew in a deep breath. "Okay. So a lot of things happened on shore leave. Besides a wedding and a spa trip and a wonderful day at the beach... The first was Soral's family. When his sister T'Mari showed up, she brought a guest. A woman named Liviana. The woman claimed to be Soral's twin sister and you could easily see the resemblance. Dr Hades confirmed it and Soral took it hard. She was half Romulan, meaning he was too."

Taking a long drink of water she frowned, "but that was nothing compared to what happened just a few days later. We got to my mother's house and there was this little girl, declaring that she was Soral's daughter. Not only that, but he had a son, her twin brother. Until that moment he knew nothing of their existence."

For a moment she fell silent, not entirely sure she had the words to truly reflect how she had felt what he felt. So many emotions, powerful ones which had overwhelmed them both. "I had never seen Soral so... in pain. And I could feel it. His anger and loss at what had been hidden from him, his shock. I believe Dr Hades later called it a cardiac episode due to the stress of it but at the time I thought he was -" she shook her head, clutching the glass. "And then his sister walked in and it was as if all of his anger and pain just - do you remember when I came to you? About the hairbrush and things moving around? At that moment, when I saw her, I felt fury. And I'm not even sure it was mine. And then every piece of glass around me just seemed to explode. Which was new..."

She stopped to let him throw in questions, she was sure in his place she would have lots.

"I remember. Seems like we've got some more data to examine, but we'll get to that." Ryan offered a comforting smile. Is Soral ok?" Normally he would concentrate on the patient at hand, but Soral had a horrible habit of avoiding him, even when there was a severe medical issue. He wanted to make sure the XO wasn't holed up without being medically cared for.

"He was allowed home the next day, being a typical difficult patient," she smiled, remembering how she had to constantly remind him that he had been ordered to rest. "But he seemed to have accepted Liviana and had even organised for them to come over for lunch. As to how he is, no. He's not okay. It got more... complicated, after that."

She hesitated taking another drink, gathering her thoughts so she could speak calmly. "The day Soral was allowed home, I remember sitting in the garden after having tea with my mother and Sara, a relative on my adopted father's side. Sara left and my mum went in to make cookies before Hades daughter joined us for lunch and then... nothing. I woke up in this room with Soral and all of these people around me. I don't remember what happened in between times and hard to focus on what happened just before it.

What I do now from Dr Hades is this. She did something to me - he has never seen it before and he couldn't undo the damage it had done.... And I can live with that - in time. But she didn't just almost kill me, she did so much more than that. My bond with Soral... it's broken!"

Ryan reached out for Alex's hand, he didn't grab hers, but put his very close; the offer made if she wanted to take it. "I know that's got to be overwhelming, but are you physically ok?"

She flashed him a grateful smile through a sudden burst of tears that she quickly brought under control, brushing them off her cheek with her free hand as she accepted his. "Just a headache and I'm so exhausted most of the time but that is getting better every day," she confided. "It will be in the report but the neurological damage was limited to only certain areas of my brain. The loss of the bond was a consequence of it, rather than the aim. I think. Dr Hades seems sure it will heal in time but until I'm fully recovered, we can't try to bond again. It feels like this huge part of me is missing, you know. A part I didn't even know just a little while ago.

I guess the telekinesis problem is solved...maybe permanently. Maybe that's a good thing. What happened in the kitchen that day scared me. Besides, it isn't like I can't do my job. What is killing me is being with Soral but not like we were. And as for Soral -"

"He is struggling, I know he is. But he's trying to protect me. As soon as we stepped foot on the ship he was arranging to work every hour he could to catch up on reports. At times with me he is still himself but at other times he seems to just close off, full Vulcan mode engaged. He mentioned a headache, I guess the same as mine, maybe worse. Whatever I was given, I couldn't feel the bond by the time I woke up, he could, only sort of muted. He felt it when it finally broke, I wasn't able to."

"He needs someone he can speak to and that isn't me, he's too protective. He doesn't want to hurt or upset me. But it is so private a thing... not exactly something we want everyone to know. You need to know, and I trust you. You are a friend and if me coming to you telling you hairbrushes were flying around and I thought I was going crazy didn't send you running for the hills, I hope this wont," Alex said with a hopeful smile. "I don't suppose there is some sneaky way you could make him have a physical? Perhaps because of his stay in hospital? I'm not sure he'd open up about things but I would feel better if I knew you had also checked him over."

"A return from away mission physical wouldn't be at all out of the ordinary, especially since his hospital visit is on record. I'll just do it a bit sooner is all." Ryan squeezed her hand lightly. "I'm not sure he'll speak to me either, but I'll at least make sure he's physically ok." He gave her hand one more light squeeze, then grabbed his tricorder. "Now as for you." He waved his tricorder playfully. "Humor me, and let me take a bazillion scans."

“Only because it is you,” she conceded with a smile.

He chuckled. "It sounds like the actually wedding was lovely." He offered, trying to lighten the mood a bit and take her mind off the hard stuff, if just for a little bit." He spoke as he began taking the promised bazillion scans.

“Oh it was,” Alex enthused with a warm smile, “right on the beach. It was picture perfect. My mum did an incredible job organising everything- and then went on a date with my old university professor because he was - and I quote - cuter than she remembered. She is incorrigible at times. I even got to give Soral an informal tour of the university when we went to dinner.”

Ryan was pleased to see that she was focussing on the happier memories. He smiled. "Well, that beats my wedding. Just think, if you want to get that professor back for any unfair grades he may have given you, you can always start calling him Dad." Ryan continued to do his scans.

“Dear lord no,” Alex grinned. “Besides, my mother is the queen of first dates. An occasional second date but never more than that. I think I’m safe! I heard you all had your hands full while we were gone. And new crew too.”

Ryan just chuckled. "We did indeed. We finally got a second doctor, and filled out a few other positions as well." Ryan finished up his scans. "I'll compare these to the readings Dr Hades took. I'm not sure if we'll be able to pinpoint a full recovery timeline, but I'll do my best."

“Another doctor... but what will you do with all your free time?” She asked with a grin. “And thank you. My leave officially ends tomorrow, I’m okay to go back on duty, right?”

"Physically yes. But if you need some time Alex, that's fine."

“I’m not big on sitting around doing nothing,” she said with a nod. “Besides, with Soral throwing himself into work I will just sit and end up talking to myself and going over and over things. I’d rather be busy and doing something constructive.”

"Fair enough." Ryan gave her an encouraging smile. "You two will be ok."

“I know, it is just going to take a bit of adjusting,” she agreed. “Thank you.”

"You're very welcome. You know my door is always open if you need anything." Ryan smiled.

She grinned, “maybe you should get engineering to install a lock?” At that she stood, “oh! Your present, thank you! You didn’t have to but it is so cute! I loved it.”

He grinned at her joke. "You're very welcome, I'm glad you liked it."

"I did, thank you Ryan," she assured him, hoping he didn't take offence to her using his first name since they were no longer discussing medical matters. "I picked out a perfect spot for it on the desk next to one of the pictures from the wedding. Which reminds me, T'Lanna is going to help plan a party here on the ship since we went back to Earth for the ceremony. I hope you can come along?"

"Absolutely. Just please don't ask me to host this time." He grinned.

“Deal,” Alex grinned. “I should go but thank you. And good luck with Soral...”

Ryan smiled, and chuckled briefly. "I'm sure I'll be fine, but thank you."

“Ha! I’ll remind you of that later,” she warned as she headed out the door.

OFF