Imperfect Plans - Part II
Previously on Imperfect Plans...
"Indeed, a shadow from the past." "I can understand. Take all the time you need to rest."
“I hate resting,” she sighed before half turning towards him, “but yes… I suppose time. Maybe… I don’t know. I look at you and I see you… but it isn’t just you anymore. And I remember how she loved him with the fire of a million suns but that was her, not me. And he took our bond and broke it, left you for dead thinking it would be a mercy to you! And I couldn’t stop it from happening. I promise you, I tried…”
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know if I can trust him, or myself,” she admitted before adding with a sad smile, “which makes ‘us’ a complicated mess.”
And now, the continuation...
She looked down at her hand, at the spot where her wedding ring would normally adorn her finger. She had given it to T’Lanna - with instructions to give it to Soral as a means to help motivate him to survive long enough to get help. She had no idea where it was now and honestly, she thought that was probably a good thing. At least for now.
“Who knows?” She asked, glancing at him. “That you aren’t just you?”
Soral reached over and took her hands in his. "We are both here and in a sense we understand one another a bit better." He opened her hand and in it he placed their wedding ring that was now on a necklace. "This is yours. Should you be ready to wear it I will always wait for you. Lexi loved him as I you, I will wait."
Alex stared down at the ring, at the delicate chain it was now attached to before closing her fingers around it. She felt vaguely numb, detached as she processed his words. Should you be ready…
“What now?” She asked quietly.
"Well, neither of us is cleared for duty so you, if you wish it, can go on that expedition once the healers have cleared you and I will return to Vulcan to spend some time with the children and to do some healing myself." He paused, "Beyond that we shall figure it out, as humans say."
"The expedition.. I read the information you left. I'm not so sure that is a good idea."
"The theory behind it is amazing. The lead researcher though - we have history. And I'm not sure that I'm ready to deal with the Braithwaite charm offensive. You go, I'll head back to Earth. Catch up with some friends and eat lots of ice cream.
Have you told the children yet?" she asked, changing the subject, gesturing to him. "About your... not being quite just you anymore?"
"No I will do so when I return. I have decided to...grant Severine her wish to study at the Monastery and Soval his wish to attend the Vulcan academy of philosophical and defence studies."
"I am sure they will appreciate your decision," Alex conceded, not entire sure how they would take the actual news of what had transpired to their father. Severine especially. "Does the Captain know about your situation?"
"Yes. I have informed them of my situation and Hamura's."
Hamura too... perfect. Alex sighed, deciding not to dwell too much on that particular point. Instead she unfastened the clasp on the necklace so she could place it around her neck. "How much of him is you, right now?" she asked curiously, studying him as if were possible to tell just by looking. In some ways, she supposed she could. He carried himself a little differently now. Nothing drastic, just more confident, assured of himself. How had she missed that before when the full on mirror him had been living in her quarters?
"At this moment if we were looking at percent I would say 75% me. It will be more blurred as we learn to meld ourselves more."
"That's a lot of villainous potential right there," she pointed out. "Are you sure being around the children is wise? You know he would do anything to get what he wants."
"He loves his family Alex. He loves you, or rather Lexi...and perhaps you as well. He saw so much of what Lexi wasn't but a strength in you, one that I have long seen from the beginning."
“She loved him too. But Lexi was… different. She had such power. He helped train her how to use it, control it. But as for him having feelings for me? No. I was a means to an end. A way for him to get her back even in a small way. And I think Lexi proved all too well who was the strongest.”
"Yet it is not Lexi here. It is you. You,..." He stopped himself from saying my wife, "You have a strength that you know not."
“Because you intervened. But I know this,” she said quietly, but with a steel edge in her voice, “if he endangers the children or my mother, I will absolutely find a way to send him back and make sure he suffers for it.”
He smiled, “A little bit of Lexi fire left. It will be alright.” He paused. “So what do you think we should do now?”
“Go back for now, before we get dragged back?” She suggested, pretty certain eyes were upon them. And if she was being honest, she was already feeling a tiredness that made her want to crawl back into bed and wish the world away for a few hours.
"Yes, for here and now we shall do that." He stood and offered her his hand. "But what of us, the future, we are not cleared for duty yet and we both have rest. If you won't go on the expedition what will you do?"
“Like I said, Earth. Maybe some time in Cambridge is what I need, see some familiar faces, be alone for a while,” she mused. After a momentary hesitation she took the offered hand, her eyes widening a little at the little spark that seemed to pass between them, reminding her of when they had first met. Before bonds forged by accident and broken by design. It caught her off guard as she quickly pulled her hand away and quickly stood. “What was that?!”
"What was what?" Her pulling back stung but he understood it.
“I… didn’t you feel it?” She stared at him and realised he couldn’t have. “Must have just been static… or my imagination. I’ll speak to the healers and find out how long until we can leave.”
He gave a nod. "Alexandra may I ask a favour of you?"
She nodded, “sure…”
"Listen to the healers, allow them to do their work."
Alex made a face, as if she’d tasted something disgusting. “Next you will be asking me not to climb out of windows…”
“Fine,” she groaned, throwing her hands up in defeat as she began walking back towards the house, “but only because I’m fairly sure it is for my good that you are asking. And that it is the good you asking too. And I can smell food…”